It is hard to imagine that 365 days have come to pass. I wasn't sure what was going to happen when I began this journey, no real commitments (other to blogging) just the idea of wanting to become healthier.
I lost 63 pounds by June of 2010. I maintained that weight through business travel and over the summer. From September to today, I have packed on inches and pounds. My weight loss is now down 35 pounds. I have quit smoking (1/4/11 will be exactly one year) which is a huge accomplishment in itself.
I went from not being able to bend over and tie my shoes at a size 28 down to a 22 pant. I am now back in a 24 pant and that is tight. I began this year loathing exercise and end it wishing I was still exercising everyday, it really did so much for me, emotionally and physically.
I found out that I had a passion for biking and hiking and that I could actually cook a pretty dang good meal that was healthy.
Overall, this was a great year. I have to admit, it terrifies me that I allowed myself to gain so much weight back in the last few months (honestly, I gained it Sept and October) and how quickly I lost my stamina and energy from not working out... it tells me that I am still the 330 pound woman. Even though the scales says otherwise, I have been eating what I want, when I want. My midnight snacking is back in nearly full force.
All though, I am struggling, I am not done. One thing I did learn this year, is that you slip, fall and get back up. You can't cry over spilt milk or obsess on what you may feel is a failure. You have to get up, dust off and keep moving.
As I have battled many challenges this year, traveled, found a full time job, lost weight, gained weight, LOVED exercising, hated exercising... I am ending the last day of 2010 very proud and content with my journey.
I will celebrate that I am 35 pounds lighter, two sizes smaller and enjoy my healthy lungs! My goal in 2011 is to move forward with my weight loss. Pick myself up, dust myself off, cook, pre-plan, weigh, measure, track what I eat and exercise.
2011 is going to be an amazing year. To health and prosperity, Happy New Year!!!
Friday, December 31, 2010
Friday, December 24, 2010
Holiday Cheer
Christmas Eve is upon us. Many of us are still running around looking for that last minute gift, wrapping presents, baking and cooking. All working so hard to get to sit back and enjoy time with our family and friends.
As I am finishing up my last minute chores, I wanted to stop and to tell all of my blog family how much you mean to me and how much each of you has impacted me this year. Thank you for all of your support, encouragement and believing in me when I did not.
What ever your religion or belief, I wish you a wonder holiday season. Enjoy your time with your family and friends, kick back and enjoy yourself and don't feel guilty about the fudge. You deserve it!
Happy Holidays!
As I am finishing up my last minute chores, I wanted to stop and to tell all of my blog family how much you mean to me and how much each of you has impacted me this year. Thank you for all of your support, encouragement and believing in me when I did not.
What ever your religion or belief, I wish you a wonder holiday season. Enjoy your time with your family and friends, kick back and enjoy yourself and don't feel guilty about the fudge. You deserve it!
Happy Holidays!
Friday, December 17, 2010
It's been too long
I think we can clearly see that my devotion to my health has tappered in the last quarter of the year. I began so strong, so fast and furious. Quiting smoking, exercising nearly everyday, eating healthy... losing inches and weight like there was no tomorrow.
That is what it was like when I wasnt' working. Now I am working, balancing a full time job, a child and my health has not been so easy. I have offically been working for nealy three months.
I am not working out any longer and I am no longer tracking my food. I have gained about 20 pounds and have gone up two sizes. It is so crazy how quickly you fall back into old ways.
The good news is that I am still in the positive. I have still lost 40 pounds for the year and I am coming up on one whole year of not smoking, woo-hoo!
I clearly have not overcome obesity or my addiction to food. I have alot of work to do. I am not giving in, I just need to find the time to dedicate to myself and simply... stop making excuses on why I can not do it!
My desire to be healthy is not gone. I am going to spend some time this weekend focusing on my needs and come up with a plan or small goals that I can accomplish to keep moving in the right direction. I will not continue to gain weight, I will not be the 330 pound woman again! I can do it, I will do it! The fight is not over!
That is what it was like when I wasnt' working. Now I am working, balancing a full time job, a child and my health has not been so easy. I have offically been working for nealy three months.
I am not working out any longer and I am no longer tracking my food. I have gained about 20 pounds and have gone up two sizes. It is so crazy how quickly you fall back into old ways.
The good news is that I am still in the positive. I have still lost 40 pounds for the year and I am coming up on one whole year of not smoking, woo-hoo!
I clearly have not overcome obesity or my addiction to food. I have alot of work to do. I am not giving in, I just need to find the time to dedicate to myself and simply... stop making excuses on why I can not do it!
My desire to be healthy is not gone. I am going to spend some time this weekend focusing on my needs and come up with a plan or small goals that I can accomplish to keep moving in the right direction. I will not continue to gain weight, I will not be the 330 pound woman again! I can do it, I will do it! The fight is not over!
Thursday, November 25, 2010
Monday, November 22, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Oiling the machine
I've exercised two days in a row! Small feat but it is a mini victory. Its crazy how quickly you fall out of shape. No worries, I'm getting back in the game and putting on my tennies... if nothing else, I will keep moving my body!
To another day of excercise! One day at a time, one meal at a time!
To another day of excercise! One day at a time, one meal at a time!
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Dinosaur Valley Adventure
One of my passions I discovered this year was hiking. I figured since I am working on getting back into the grove, what better than doing something I enjoy :)
My son had his best friend spend the weekend with us so, how was I going to encourage them to get off the couch and step away from the video game remote control? DINOSAURS!!!
Fortunately, we have a wonder state park about and hour and a half away from us that is actually an archaeological dig sight... yea, no joke! It is called Dinosaur Valley and is located in Glen Rose TX. We got up extra early this morning and hit the road ready for adventure.
As we got closer to the park, the boys (even though they are 14) began to fantasize and talk about Dinosaurs roaming the Earth and lurking in the deep sea of trees. I found myself getting wrapped up in their fantasy world and imagined huge dinosaurs walking along with us.
We entered the park and decided to park at Track Site #1, there are three in total. Off we set in our adventure. Reading every sign, climbing up and down hills, crossing shallow water, through the thicket and beyond the path... we finally stumbled across tracks. How exciting. Its amazing to know that Dinosaurs roamed the very place we stood millions of years ago.
We hiked for 3.5 hours and played a good 1.5. We had a great time! The boys enjoyed skipping rocks across the water, catching frogs and tadpoles. I joined in on the fun, I just couldn't resist. We enjoyed our sack lunches and laughed and enjoyed each others company. We really had a great time.
It was very nice to get outside and get moving. I have to admit, not working out for the last six weeks has really taken its toll on me. Not to worry, I know I will regain my momentum over the next several weeks.
After driving back to town, I took my sons best friend home and went grocery shopping. Again, I found myself standing in the diet pill section looking for that thing, that little something to jump start my weight loss. I am not sure why I feel so weak. (It couldn't have anything to do with the Donuts I had for breakfast or the Chicken Finger Basket I had for dinner... yea, fried city galore). I did pick up a Detox kit... SlimQuick Cleanse and Detox. I also bought SlimQuick Ultra Fat Burner. Yea, I know... no magic pill will do it but I figured the detox will help remove toxins and waste which will hopefully give me a little jump start. I am not going to start the Fat Burner pill until I have completed my cleanse, which will be in 14 days. I am hoping that in the 14 days some of my sugar and fat cravings will have decreased and maybe I won't use the SlimQuick Fat Burner. Time will tell.
Here are a few pics from today
My son had his best friend spend the weekend with us so, how was I going to encourage them to get off the couch and step away from the video game remote control? DINOSAURS!!!
Fortunately, we have a wonder state park about and hour and a half away from us that is actually an archaeological dig sight... yea, no joke! It is called Dinosaur Valley and is located in Glen Rose TX. We got up extra early this morning and hit the road ready for adventure.
As we got closer to the park, the boys (even though they are 14) began to fantasize and talk about Dinosaurs roaming the Earth and lurking in the deep sea of trees. I found myself getting wrapped up in their fantasy world and imagined huge dinosaurs walking along with us.
We entered the park and decided to park at Track Site #1, there are three in total. Off we set in our adventure. Reading every sign, climbing up and down hills, crossing shallow water, through the thicket and beyond the path... we finally stumbled across tracks. How exciting. Its amazing to know that Dinosaurs roamed the very place we stood millions of years ago.
We hiked for 3.5 hours and played a good 1.5. We had a great time! The boys enjoyed skipping rocks across the water, catching frogs and tadpoles. I joined in on the fun, I just couldn't resist. We enjoyed our sack lunches and laughed and enjoyed each others company. We really had a great time.
It was very nice to get outside and get moving. I have to admit, not working out for the last six weeks has really taken its toll on me. Not to worry, I know I will regain my momentum over the next several weeks.
After driving back to town, I took my sons best friend home and went grocery shopping. Again, I found myself standing in the diet pill section looking for that thing, that little something to jump start my weight loss. I am not sure why I feel so weak. (It couldn't have anything to do with the Donuts I had for breakfast or the Chicken Finger Basket I had for dinner... yea, fried city galore). I did pick up a Detox kit... SlimQuick Cleanse and Detox. I also bought SlimQuick Ultra Fat Burner. Yea, I know... no magic pill will do it but I figured the detox will help remove toxins and waste which will hopefully give me a little jump start. I am not going to start the Fat Burner pill until I have completed my cleanse, which will be in 14 days. I am hoping that in the 14 days some of my sugar and fat cravings will have decreased and maybe I won't use the SlimQuick Fat Burner. Time will tell.
Here are a few pics from today
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Feeling today is a great day for the outdoors!
It's gorgeous in Dallas today! The weather is perfect and the sun is out... I am feeling an outdoor adventure. Hiking or Biking... hmmmm???
Thursday, October 14, 2010
The Good, The Bad and The Ugly
I don't even know where to begin. Clearly, I have not been committed to making my health a priority in the last 6 weeks. Somewhere between traveling for 5 weeks, coming home, accepting a FULL TIME JOB (YEA... I am no longer unemployed!), working 40-50+ hours a week, becoming a traveling taxi for a teen, catching up on chores at home, working on big projects and breathing... I have not gotten back into a routine of eating healthy or working out. I just can't seem to balance the tight rope... I want to do good, I say I am gonna do it but then there just doesn't seem to be enough time in the day to plan my meals, count calories or even to jump on my bike and ride.
Instead, I find myself day dreaming about losing weight... beating myself up because I have gained roughly 12 pounds of 62 pounds that I've lost. I am back in the hustle of bustle of everyday life and I finding that I have easily put myself on the back burner. I never intended for it to happen that way.
Even while traveling, I kept up my workouts... now, I was eating out every meal but I still worked out 5 days a week. I've been home since 9/4 and honestly, I have worked out only 3 or 4 times?!?!?! Not only have I not been working out, I am still grabbing food on the go, breakfast and lunch. Not only is it food on the go, it has turned into burgers, fries and greasy fried tacos.
I don't want to give in, I just have to find the balance. Most importantly, I need to stop beating myself and celebrate what I have still accomplished. I am still at 50 pounds lost and I have not smoked since 1/4/10 ... that is 9 months! WOW!
I want to thank everyone for encouraging and supporting me. Your feedback, comment and support means so much. I am going to take the challenge presented by many of you and prioritize my goals.
When I began my blog on Jan 1st 2010, my goal was to become healthy. I didn't have a plan however I committed to blogging. I haven't been blogging (partly because I am super duper busy ( I have traveled to 3 states this week, YIKES, while also trying to fit in my sons football game) and also because I don't want to acknowledge that I am not doing whats best for my health.
In the beginning, I committed to blogging about the good, the bad and the ugly... this just happens to be part of the ugly and I will begin to blog again on a daily basis... the good, the bad and the ugly... accountability!
One meal at a time, One day at a time. My journey continues...
Instead, I find myself day dreaming about losing weight... beating myself up because I have gained roughly 12 pounds of 62 pounds that I've lost. I am back in the hustle of bustle of everyday life and I finding that I have easily put myself on the back burner. I never intended for it to happen that way.
Even while traveling, I kept up my workouts... now, I was eating out every meal but I still worked out 5 days a week. I've been home since 9/4 and honestly, I have worked out only 3 or 4 times?!?!?! Not only have I not been working out, I am still grabbing food on the go, breakfast and lunch. Not only is it food on the go, it has turned into burgers, fries and greasy fried tacos.
I don't want to give in, I just have to find the balance. Most importantly, I need to stop beating myself and celebrate what I have still accomplished. I am still at 50 pounds lost and I have not smoked since 1/4/10 ... that is 9 months! WOW!
I want to thank everyone for encouraging and supporting me. Your feedback, comment and support means so much. I am going to take the challenge presented by many of you and prioritize my goals.
When I began my blog on Jan 1st 2010, my goal was to become healthy. I didn't have a plan however I committed to blogging. I haven't been blogging (partly because I am super duper busy ( I have traveled to 3 states this week, YIKES, while also trying to fit in my sons football game) and also because I don't want to acknowledge that I am not doing whats best for my health.
In the beginning, I committed to blogging about the good, the bad and the ugly... this just happens to be part of the ugly and I will begin to blog again on a daily basis... the good, the bad and the ugly... accountability!
One meal at a time, One day at a time. My journey continues...
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Monday, September 20, 2010
Getting back on the wagon
It's been a week and I still haven't seemed to jump back on the band wagon of living healthy. I have not "officially" worked out, allthough I painted my house which was a workout! I did eat a little better for most of my meals. I ate out 3 times which I guess is better than 3 times in a day. I drank more water but not nearly enough.
I found myself wanting to buy cigaretted twice, I hadn't really wanted to do that in a while. I fear I am entering into self-sabotage. Last night, I found myself at Wal-Mart looking at Diet pills. I know damn well the answer is not in a bottle of pills. It is counting calories, eating healthier and exercise.
I didn't get up and workout this morning as planned, I slept right through my alarm. The day is young, so I commit to myself atleast 30 minutes this evening to workout.
Time management, being prepared, logging calories, drinking water, exercise... I've got to get back on track!!! Get back on track!!! Get back on track!!! A few month's ago, it seemed so easy and now it is feeling like so much work. The good news is that it doesnt seem impossible, now if I can just get back on the wagon.
A little encouragement to help motivate me this week is that I did drop two pounds last week. Let's see what I can do this week...
One meal at a time, One day at a time.
I found myself wanting to buy cigaretted twice, I hadn't really wanted to do that in a while. I fear I am entering into self-sabotage. Last night, I found myself at Wal-Mart looking at Diet pills. I know damn well the answer is not in a bottle of pills. It is counting calories, eating healthier and exercise.
I didn't get up and workout this morning as planned, I slept right through my alarm. The day is young, so I commit to myself atleast 30 minutes this evening to workout.
Time management, being prepared, logging calories, drinking water, exercise... I've got to get back on track!!! Get back on track!!! Get back on track!!! A few month's ago, it seemed so easy and now it is feeling like so much work. The good news is that it doesnt seem impossible, now if I can just get back on the wagon.
A little encouragement to help motivate me this week is that I did drop two pounds last week. Let's see what I can do this week...
One meal at a time, One day at a time.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Lucy's got some splan'n to do
I wish I would have forced myself to sit down and write this blog last Monday when I weighed myself but I just didn't find the time. As many of you know, I traveled for the last 5 weeks for work. I maintained working out however I ate out every meal, breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Initially, I really tried to eat healthy, as the weeks passed, I order a bigger steak, added cheese, ate fried foods and asked for extra gravy. I also wasn't sleeping very well which of course, does not help your metabolism.
I made it back to Dallas around midnight on 9/3. I was pretty exhausted because I was living on about 9 hours of sleep for the entire week. When I got home, I vegged out with my son for an hour and then hit the sack. We ran errands all day on Saturday and ate out for lunch and dinner. Sunday, we enjoyed a BBQ at my sisters house, it was great spending time with the family. On my way home, I stopped at the store and got some groceries. I was ready to cook healthy meals and get back on track.
Monday morning, I weighed myself
Oh my goodness, I gained 7 pounds in 5 weeks... this is my first gain since January. I have to get back on track. I was ready, I had a healthy breakfast, had a sensible lunch packed and even a few healthy snacks. I worked until 6:30, by the time I was home, it was pretty late, I had laundry to do so I picked up a pizza. Tuesday started off strong, breakfast, snacks and lunch ready to go. I wasn't ready for the candy bars that were sitting in the office when I got out of the classroom. And before you knew it, I ate three and two bags of chips. What the heck??? I lost it and binged. Wednesday was just as bad, except I was able to reserve and only eat two candy bars. Thursday night was another pizza night and Friday was Red Lobsters. On Saturday it was Olive Garden and Sunday morning it was Denny's.
Things are out of control. What really freaks me out, is that I can feel it in my stomach, it's bloated, I am uncomfortable and feel sluggish. Yet, I keep doing it. I honestly had to ask myself, what are you doing? I was only 3 measly pounds away from losing 65 pounds yet, I am eating like I have nothing to lose.
I am stressed, I am working on getting back into the groove of things but it really freaks me out to see how easy it was to fall back into old habits.
For an even bigger reality check, I weighed myself this evening and I nearly feel over
I have gained 7 pounds since 09/06. Yea, look at the dates on those photo's. What the heck is going on?
I'm gonna tell you, I have been careless, I didn't work out at all last week and I am not counting calories. VACATION is over (not that I was on one)!!! Momma is back and I have a lot to get a handle on.
I'm working on getting back into a routine and balance. I am not going to beat myself up, it is scary that I allowed myself to slip so far into a downward spiral but regardless, I have come a long way this year. I love myself and I will find the balance, after all, I want to be healthy. This is a life long commitment and this is only a small hurdle in the road.
My Goals for September (from this moment forward):
1. Drink 8 glasses of water a day
2. Track everything I eat
3. Exercise 4 days a week
One meal at a time, one day at a time! 2010 is my year and I am going to ROCK it!
Initially, I really tried to eat healthy, as the weeks passed, I order a bigger steak, added cheese, ate fried foods and asked for extra gravy. I also wasn't sleeping very well which of course, does not help your metabolism.
I made it back to Dallas around midnight on 9/3. I was pretty exhausted because I was living on about 9 hours of sleep for the entire week. When I got home, I vegged out with my son for an hour and then hit the sack. We ran errands all day on Saturday and ate out for lunch and dinner. Sunday, we enjoyed a BBQ at my sisters house, it was great spending time with the family. On my way home, I stopped at the store and got some groceries. I was ready to cook healthy meals and get back on track.
Monday morning, I weighed myself
Oh my goodness, I gained 7 pounds in 5 weeks... this is my first gain since January. I have to get back on track. I was ready, I had a healthy breakfast, had a sensible lunch packed and even a few healthy snacks. I worked until 6:30, by the time I was home, it was pretty late, I had laundry to do so I picked up a pizza. Tuesday started off strong, breakfast, snacks and lunch ready to go. I wasn't ready for the candy bars that were sitting in the office when I got out of the classroom. And before you knew it, I ate three and two bags of chips. What the heck??? I lost it and binged. Wednesday was just as bad, except I was able to reserve and only eat two candy bars. Thursday night was another pizza night and Friday was Red Lobsters. On Saturday it was Olive Garden and Sunday morning it was Denny's.
Things are out of control. What really freaks me out, is that I can feel it in my stomach, it's bloated, I am uncomfortable and feel sluggish. Yet, I keep doing it. I honestly had to ask myself, what are you doing? I was only 3 measly pounds away from losing 65 pounds yet, I am eating like I have nothing to lose.
I am stressed, I am working on getting back into the groove of things but it really freaks me out to see how easy it was to fall back into old habits.
For an even bigger reality check, I weighed myself this evening and I nearly feel over
I have gained 7 pounds since 09/06. Yea, look at the dates on those photo's. What the heck is going on?
I'm gonna tell you, I have been careless, I didn't work out at all last week and I am not counting calories. VACATION is over (not that I was on one)!!! Momma is back and I have a lot to get a handle on.
I'm working on getting back into a routine and balance. I am not going to beat myself up, it is scary that I allowed myself to slip so far into a downward spiral but regardless, I have come a long way this year. I love myself and I will find the balance, after all, I want to be healthy. This is a life long commitment and this is only a small hurdle in the road.
My Goals for September (from this moment forward):
1. Drink 8 glasses of water a day
2. Track everything I eat
3. Exercise 4 days a week
One meal at a time, one day at a time! 2010 is my year and I am going to ROCK it!
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Monday, August 23, 2010
The busy bee
Hey All! Just wanted to say that I am still here. Things have been crazy busy in CO. I am so excited that I will be headed home this Thursday after class. I should arrive in Dallas around midnight, woo-hoo, to sleep in my bed!
My son began High School today, geez, time flies! He said he enjoyed his first day, of course, no school work, just getting settled into all of his classes. I really just can't wait to get home and spend some time with him.
I will be back in Denver on the 31st. I return to Dallas on the 4th for good. Yippee!
Don't get me wrong, traveling for work has been a very fun experience. I have had the opportunity to sight see and meet one of my most favorite SPARKERS SKTRAINOR! The weather in Denver is amazing and well, it is simply gorgeous here. My hotel is really nice but I have to admit, there is no place like home!
I kinda feel like August has just blown by. I have basically been out of the town the entire month and just don't know where the time has gone. Things will slow back down when I am home on the 4th and things can get back to normal. I can't wait to get on bike and enjoy a ride. It has been so long since I have rode.
I have plenty of blogs to sit down and write and gorgeous photo's to share. I've had the opportunity to visit the Rocky Mountains, Mt. Evans and Red Rock Amphitheatre, not to mention the beautiful Denver Botanic Gardens.
Right now I am focusing on keeping up my workouts. I have been doing my best to order healthier food but I am still eating out every single meal, 3 meals a day. I really feel bloated but I am not going to worry about it right now. I am working out and will get 100% focused when I am home and can count calories, cook my own food and ride my bike, do my exercise videos and so on.
I have set a new goal, my birthday is in October (the 8th to be exact) and would like to have lost 75 pounds by then. I know I am going to need to kick it into high gear in September but I know I can do it! One meal at a time, one day at a time!
My son began High School today, geez, time flies! He said he enjoyed his first day, of course, no school work, just getting settled into all of his classes. I really just can't wait to get home and spend some time with him.
I will be back in Denver on the 31st. I return to Dallas on the 4th for good. Yippee!
Don't get me wrong, traveling for work has been a very fun experience. I have had the opportunity to sight see and meet one of my most favorite SPARKERS SKTRAINOR! The weather in Denver is amazing and well, it is simply gorgeous here. My hotel is really nice but I have to admit, there is no place like home!
I kinda feel like August has just blown by. I have basically been out of the town the entire month and just don't know where the time has gone. Things will slow back down when I am home on the 4th and things can get back to normal. I can't wait to get on bike and enjoy a ride. It has been so long since I have rode.
I have plenty of blogs to sit down and write and gorgeous photo's to share. I've had the opportunity to visit the Rocky Mountains, Mt. Evans and Red Rock Amphitheatre, not to mention the beautiful Denver Botanic Gardens.
Right now I am focusing on keeping up my workouts. I have been doing my best to order healthier food but I am still eating out every single meal, 3 meals a day. I really feel bloated but I am not going to worry about it right now. I am working out and will get 100% focused when I am home and can count calories, cook my own food and ride my bike, do my exercise videos and so on.
I have set a new goal, my birthday is in October (the 8th to be exact) and would like to have lost 75 pounds by then. I know I am going to need to kick it into high gear in September but I know I can do it! One meal at a time, one day at a time!
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Where has time gone
On 08/05 I flew to Denver for work. In between working 10-12 hour days and fitting in some incredible sight seeing, I was glad to head back home last Wednesday. Of course, I worked from 7am to 6pm, jumped on an eight o'clock flight and made it home around 11:30. Even though I was exhausted when I arrived home, a second wind kicked in and I didn't wind down and go to bed until 1am. I worked on Thursday and Friday.
I washed laundry, did yard work and tried to get things in order. My son (love ya honey) finally came home from summer vacation (he has been gone for about 7 weeks, yikes) on Saturday. When he got home off to the streets we went. School shopping for high school. Oh my goodness, how surreal.
We got home late on Saturday, I cooked dinner and we hung out. This morning, I got up and finished packing my bags and headed back to Denver. It was hard to say goodbye and he wasn't ready to repack his bags either, but we do what we have to do.
I am going to be in Denver for two weeks this stay... I had hoped to download my pics from the Botanic Gardens and also from the Rockies but I never found the time. I am really hoping this trip I am able to rent a bike and ride a few trails and I also hope to make it up to Pikes Peak.
I have to admit, that all the locals say that Pikes Peak is overrated, but being a tourist, I just can't resist :)
I weighed when I arrived home last week and well, I gained two pounds. TOM was here but I also know I was eating much heavier than I usually do because I was out of town. I will continue my workouts but will work on ordering healthier food this trip. I was only 12 pounds away from 75 pounds lost and now, I am 14 pounds away. All is not lost, I will continue on, I just need to refocus.
When my son and I were out shopping, he said: Mom, you've lost more weight, your stomach has gone down. It felt great to hear that. It made me feel proud. I told him I have lost nearly 65 pounds and he just smiled. He asked how much more do you want to lose? I said about 135 more pounds... and he smiled and said, your gonna do it Mom, your already 1/3 there. What a smile it left on my face.
Dedication and Determination, it will happen!
I washed laundry, did yard work and tried to get things in order. My son (love ya honey) finally came home from summer vacation (he has been gone for about 7 weeks, yikes) on Saturday. When he got home off to the streets we went. School shopping for high school. Oh my goodness, how surreal.
We got home late on Saturday, I cooked dinner and we hung out. This morning, I got up and finished packing my bags and headed back to Denver. It was hard to say goodbye and he wasn't ready to repack his bags either, but we do what we have to do.
I am going to be in Denver for two weeks this stay... I had hoped to download my pics from the Botanic Gardens and also from the Rockies but I never found the time. I am really hoping this trip I am able to rent a bike and ride a few trails and I also hope to make it up to Pikes Peak.
I have to admit, that all the locals say that Pikes Peak is overrated, but being a tourist, I just can't resist :)
I weighed when I arrived home last week and well, I gained two pounds. TOM was here but I also know I was eating much heavier than I usually do because I was out of town. I will continue my workouts but will work on ordering healthier food this trip. I was only 12 pounds away from 75 pounds lost and now, I am 14 pounds away. All is not lost, I will continue on, I just need to refocus.
When my son and I were out shopping, he said: Mom, you've lost more weight, your stomach has gone down. It felt great to hear that. It made me feel proud. I told him I have lost nearly 65 pounds and he just smiled. He asked how much more do you want to lose? I said about 135 more pounds... and he smiled and said, your gonna do it Mom, your already 1/3 there. What a smile it left on my face.
Dedication and Determination, it will happen!
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Text Blogging... not a good idea
Okay, so I attempted to text a blog. 45 minutes and one cramped finger later, no post!
So, what's the dill bill? Where has the 330 Pound Woman been, you ask? Well, I have been crazy busy. As most of you know, I am currently working a contract job and on Thursday, I flew to Denver for business. I will be here working most of month... basically thru September 4th.
I arrived late on Thursday (sat in the Airport most of the day, my flight was only and hour and fourty-five minutes). Was up a little late that evening, checking into the hotel, unpacking, a late night meeting, dinner, a quick trip to the office and then finally sleep. Friday, we were going to be in the office by 6am so I actually got up at 3:50am to workout. Yes, I thought I was crazy as well... good news is, I got in a great workout: 4.5 miles on the Elliptical which was 510 calories burned and gone forever!!! Woo-Hoo!
Yesterday, I had the awesome opportunity to meet one of my most favorite SPARKERS, KELLIGIRL1977 and her dear friend Cynthia. We went to the Denver Botanic Gardens (beautiful) and then to the 16th Street Shopping Center (amazing). We walked for about 5 hours. I'm not sure the distance or how many calories that were burned but 5 hours, it has to be off the charts! We decided to grab a bite to eat and headed for a Sushi bar. It was a first for me and well, it wasn't exactly my thing. I was excited to try it but I don't think I will do it again. The girls loved it though.. let me see if I can remember what we had. There was California Rolls, Lava Rolls, Poki Rolls, Spider Rolls and I can not remember the other. There was eel, crab, tuna and salmon, one was cooked and the others were marinated. If you enjoy Sushi, this would have been a hit with you. There was just something about the texture that I couldn't get past. But hey, to each is own.
Denver is gorgeous guys. It is full of life, entertainment and the sunrise is breathtaking. I actually meet four students at work on Friday that said they moved to Denver after visiting on vacation, I can understand why.
I have tons of pictures to share, I'm not on my computer, I am in the business center in my hotel so I will have to wait until I am at home to post. I will be home next weekend so take a peak back then and enjoy the ride :)
Today, my boss and I are going to find some mountains, I am so excited and ready to hike in Colorado! Rocky Mountains, here I come!
So, what's the dill bill? Where has the 330 Pound Woman been, you ask? Well, I have been crazy busy. As most of you know, I am currently working a contract job and on Thursday, I flew to Denver for business. I will be here working most of month... basically thru September 4th.
I arrived late on Thursday (sat in the Airport most of the day, my flight was only and hour and fourty-five minutes). Was up a little late that evening, checking into the hotel, unpacking, a late night meeting, dinner, a quick trip to the office and then finally sleep. Friday, we were going to be in the office by 6am so I actually got up at 3:50am to workout. Yes, I thought I was crazy as well... good news is, I got in a great workout: 4.5 miles on the Elliptical which was 510 calories burned and gone forever!!! Woo-Hoo!
Yesterday, I had the awesome opportunity to meet one of my most favorite SPARKERS, KELLIGIRL1977 and her dear friend Cynthia. We went to the Denver Botanic Gardens (beautiful) and then to the 16th Street Shopping Center (amazing). We walked for about 5 hours. I'm not sure the distance or how many calories that were burned but 5 hours, it has to be off the charts! We decided to grab a bite to eat and headed for a Sushi bar. It was a first for me and well, it wasn't exactly my thing. I was excited to try it but I don't think I will do it again. The girls loved it though.. let me see if I can remember what we had. There was California Rolls, Lava Rolls, Poki Rolls, Spider Rolls and I can not remember the other. There was eel, crab, tuna and salmon, one was cooked and the others were marinated. If you enjoy Sushi, this would have been a hit with you. There was just something about the texture that I couldn't get past. But hey, to each is own.
Denver is gorgeous guys. It is full of life, entertainment and the sunrise is breathtaking. I actually meet four students at work on Friday that said they moved to Denver after visiting on vacation, I can understand why.
I have tons of pictures to share, I'm not on my computer, I am in the business center in my hotel so I will have to wait until I am at home to post. I will be home next weekend so take a peak back then and enjoy the ride :)
Today, my boss and I are going to find some mountains, I am so excited and ready to hike in Colorado! Rocky Mountains, here I come!
Sunday, August 1, 2010
WIPE OUT!!!
I have officially had my first WIPE OUT! Yup, it was destined to happen and finally did. Yesterday I went out with a friend for a 25 mile bike ride. I was hyped that I was ready to push myself and do 25 miles.
It was a gorgeous ride, a beautiful trail along the river.... plenty of trees, gorgeous scenery and the flowing water. I saw several horses during the ride, really taking it all in. About 8 miles into the ride there is an underpass under a major freeway, you pass a section where there are cars. Of course, using caution I passed. I crossed the road before my friend. As I look back to check on her I somehow winded up getting wedged between the concrete path and dirt, my tire was completely wedged and I couldn't get out of the grove. Looking up I see this wooden railing, I'm headed strait for it.... my heart is pumping, I'm losing control, I pull to the left as much as I can and then it happened, I was flying off the bike... I suddenly turned into the flying cyclist and landed hard on the concrete. Oh man, did it hurt!
Thank goodness, I really arched my back and avoided hitting my face, I jumped up quickly in the horror that I was about to be ran over by other cyclist. I pick up my bike and my friend helps rinse off my arm. Being a previous Boy Scout Leader, I of course, had Neosporin. I check out my bike, straiten my handlebar and hit the trail again. My knee and underneath my forearm, were throbbing... not to mention, the fact I was shaken up. About another 5 miles in, I found myself in the same situation, I over corrected and almost wiped out again. My adrenalin was pumping and well, I was just plain terrified.
With the adrenalin pumping up twice and the fear, I decided I better call it a day at 15 miles. It was a great ride, but I must admit, I wondered what Mother Nature was telling me. This week alone, I have been chased by a dog, almost hit by a car, ate a bug, wiped out and ALMOST wiped out again!
Today I am very sore, feel like I have whiplash in my neck, my ribs hurt (they took a lot of impact on the fall) and my knee is very swollen. I thought maybe I need to give my bike a break and maybe park it a while but then I realized something. Like all sports, you begin to get a confidence and you don't win them all. It's not time to park my bike, I will make a conscience effort to be more aware of my surroundings and my form. Most importantly, I will remember how much I enjoy the ride.
Of course, I have a few pics.... I considered reenactment of the crash, but just couldn't do it, LOL!
This is the railing that I almost hit, notice my bike track along the side of the concrete
This is my arm immediately after the crash
My helpful and concerned friend (awesome lady)
My arm today
Now this is getting random, but thought I'd let y'all know that I am a red head now
And this is a size 18 dress that I tried on today (I didn't buy it, but was super hyped that it fit)
Oh yea... a few weeks back, a friend of mine gave me some clothes (thanks Rai) and this is one of the dresses she gave me, I haven't worn it out yet, but I am thinking about wearing it when I go dancing with my friends... I am working up my confidence for it though. Oh yea, this is a pre-red picture (I'm a fiery red as of last night)
It was a gorgeous ride, a beautiful trail along the river.... plenty of trees, gorgeous scenery and the flowing water. I saw several horses during the ride, really taking it all in. About 8 miles into the ride there is an underpass under a major freeway, you pass a section where there are cars. Of course, using caution I passed. I crossed the road before my friend. As I look back to check on her I somehow winded up getting wedged between the concrete path and dirt, my tire was completely wedged and I couldn't get out of the grove. Looking up I see this wooden railing, I'm headed strait for it.... my heart is pumping, I'm losing control, I pull to the left as much as I can and then it happened, I was flying off the bike... I suddenly turned into the flying cyclist and landed hard on the concrete. Oh man, did it hurt!
Thank goodness, I really arched my back and avoided hitting my face, I jumped up quickly in the horror that I was about to be ran over by other cyclist. I pick up my bike and my friend helps rinse off my arm. Being a previous Boy Scout Leader, I of course, had Neosporin. I check out my bike, straiten my handlebar and hit the trail again. My knee and underneath my forearm, were throbbing... not to mention, the fact I was shaken up. About another 5 miles in, I found myself in the same situation, I over corrected and almost wiped out again. My adrenalin was pumping and well, I was just plain terrified.
With the adrenalin pumping up twice and the fear, I decided I better call it a day at 15 miles. It was a great ride, but I must admit, I wondered what Mother Nature was telling me. This week alone, I have been chased by a dog, almost hit by a car, ate a bug, wiped out and ALMOST wiped out again!
Today I am very sore, feel like I have whiplash in my neck, my ribs hurt (they took a lot of impact on the fall) and my knee is very swollen. I thought maybe I need to give my bike a break and maybe park it a while but then I realized something. Like all sports, you begin to get a confidence and you don't win them all. It's not time to park my bike, I will make a conscience effort to be more aware of my surroundings and my form. Most importantly, I will remember how much I enjoy the ride.
Of course, I have a few pics.... I considered reenactment of the crash, but just couldn't do it, LOL!
This is the railing that I almost hit, notice my bike track along the side of the concrete
This is my arm immediately after the crash
My helpful and concerned friend (awesome lady)
My arm today
Now this is getting random, but thought I'd let y'all know that I am a red head now
And this is a size 18 dress that I tried on today (I didn't buy it, but was super hyped that it fit)
Oh yea... a few weeks back, a friend of mine gave me some clothes (thanks Rai) and this is one of the dresses she gave me, I haven't worn it out yet, but I am thinking about wearing it when I go dancing with my friends... I am working up my confidence for it though. Oh yea, this is a pre-red picture (I'm a fiery red as of last night)
Sunday, July 25, 2010
3.... 2 .... 1 .... Lift Off
Okay, I have been stuck in the land of 270ish FOREVER!!!! Almost two months to be exact, I'd move back in forth 278 to 275... then finally 275 to 272.... last week I finally hit 270 pounds and I was just ecstatic. It was my first time to actually hit 2 - 7 - 0. I pumped up my workouts and tried a new workout (Turbo Jam, gotta love it) and today, what do I see on the scale???
Yes, that is right... 268 pounds!!!! Oh yea, that means I have lost a whooping 62 pounds since January 1st! Woo-hoo!!! I am feeling stronger, emotionally and physically and I see my body changing. Sure, there are plenty of things I could pick apart but I remind myself, I am healthier than I have ever been as an adult and I am working on me, which also means loving every bit of myself.
Right now, I just want to enjoy the fact that I have finally busted through the 270's which means I am moving again! I am literally on cloud nine and cant wait to hit the 75 pounds gone.
To make this a little fun:
I have officially lost 200 sticks of butter and a bald eagle .... or
5000 BTU Air Conditioner, a Chihuahua and a rack of baby back ribs .... or
A small bale of hay, a human head and an ostrich egg
I am excited and of course, you know I am ready for a workout! I think I will take my bike out for a nice cruise! Thanks for celebrating with me!!! Woot-Woot!
Houston, she has left the building!!!
Yes, that is right... 268 pounds!!!! Oh yea, that means I have lost a whooping 62 pounds since January 1st! Woo-hoo!!! I am feeling stronger, emotionally and physically and I see my body changing. Sure, there are plenty of things I could pick apart but I remind myself, I am healthier than I have ever been as an adult and I am working on me, which also means loving every bit of myself.
Right now, I just want to enjoy the fact that I have finally busted through the 270's which means I am moving again! I am literally on cloud nine and cant wait to hit the 75 pounds gone.
To make this a little fun:
I have officially lost 200 sticks of butter and a bald eagle .... or
5000 BTU Air Conditioner, a Chihuahua and a rack of baby back ribs .... or
A small bale of hay, a human head and an ostrich egg
I am excited and of course, you know I am ready for a workout! I think I will take my bike out for a nice cruise! Thanks for celebrating with me!!! Woot-Woot!
Houston, she has left the building!!!
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Canoeing, Kayaking & Hiking, that's what I'm talkin bout!
Had a great time canoeing, hiking and kayaking today! Here are a few shots from our day and let me just say, it was HOT HOT HOT!!! No worries, we drank plenty of water and enjoyed a few snacks during our adventure.
The three of us started out in one canoe, that was interesting! It wasn't very steady and honestly, we felt like we couldn't move without worrying the canoe would flip. When a kayak was available, we headed back to shore and I jumped into a Kayak. I wasn't sure if I would like it but I did. It was very fun but I had this issue, right right right, I kept going in right circles... crazy thing is... I am right handed, so I thought it would be left circles but who know's. None the less, it was very fun and let me say, the Kayak is a big workout... great upper body, core and obliques... I might be sore in the morning!
After canoeing and kayaking we enoyed a two mile hike... again, oh so HOT but none the less, we had a great time. Here are a few snap shots:
The three of us started out in one canoe, that was interesting! It wasn't very steady and honestly, we felt like we couldn't move without worrying the canoe would flip. When a kayak was available, we headed back to shore and I jumped into a Kayak. I wasn't sure if I would like it but I did. It was very fun but I had this issue, right right right, I kept going in right circles... crazy thing is... I am right handed, so I thought it would be left circles but who know's. None the less, it was very fun and let me say, the Kayak is a big workout... great upper body, core and obliques... I might be sore in the morning!
After canoeing and kayaking we enoyed a two mile hike... again, oh so HOT but none the less, we had a great time. Here are a few snap shots:
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Busy as a Bee..... bzzzz.... bzzzz
Just wanted to let everyone know that I am still here and doing good. Back to work and well, things are on and poppin! Busy as a bee.
I have been getting in my morning workouts and bringing my lunch to work. I did eat fast food 3 times last week, twice breakfast and once for lunch. Let me just say, when you work out at 5am (how did I become that girl?) your stomach demands food by atleast 7:30. This week, I set my alarm clock a little earlier so I would have time to make breakfast at home... so far, so good!
It's hard to imagine that I was out of work for 8 months, I am so busy right now it feels like I have been working the last 6 month's. The irony, gotta love it.
Over the weekend a friend of mine gave me some new clothes (she has also lost weight) and I am proud to say that I have 18's and 1X clothing that fits... wow, exciting! I got many cute things, I will work on a photo shoot and post some pics soon.
In the mean time, I will continue to focus on morning workouts, breakfast at home and taking my lunch. As always...one meal at a time, one day at a time!
I have been getting in my morning workouts and bringing my lunch to work. I did eat fast food 3 times last week, twice breakfast and once for lunch. Let me just say, when you work out at 5am (how did I become that girl?) your stomach demands food by atleast 7:30. This week, I set my alarm clock a little earlier so I would have time to make breakfast at home... so far, so good!
It's hard to imagine that I was out of work for 8 months, I am so busy right now it feels like I have been working the last 6 month's. The irony, gotta love it.
Over the weekend a friend of mine gave me some new clothes (she has also lost weight) and I am proud to say that I have 18's and 1X clothing that fits... wow, exciting! I got many cute things, I will work on a photo shoot and post some pics soon.
In the mean time, I will continue to focus on morning workouts, breakfast at home and taking my lunch. As always...one meal at a time, one day at a time!
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Making a Choice
Yesterday was a stressful day. Not sure if was the fact that Tuesday was my Monday or I was running behind on chores... it was just a tough day. When I left the office yesterday, I wanted a cigarette. Seriously WANTED a cigarette. You know, gut wrenching, need it right now and can't stop till I get it!
I stopped smoking on 01/04/10, yesterday was a true test. I stopped at Walgreen's (best priced cigarettes in town) and stared out them. The clerk asked if he could help me and I said no, I just stood there and stared at them. I wanted to smell or even just hold them but I knew it would be over. I asked myself, what the hell are you doing and got the heck out of dodge.
On my way home I stopped at Sonic and ordered Mozzarella sticks. From one craving to the next, huh? Yea, I caved, I snubbed the cigarettes and decided to go fried. I have to admit, the 5 cheese sticks were the best thing I have eaten in a good while, not literally but it did give me the comfort and ease I was looking for.
I don't feel guilty about my choice, if I did it everyday, it would be a problem but I stopped at the cheese sticks and I got up this morning and had a great workout. Life goes on.
I could sit around all day and try to understand why I allowed myself to turn to food for comfort but instead, I will remind myself that I am on an ever changing journey, new challenges and obstacles everyday. Just like wine, I will improve in quality over time. In the mean time, I will remind myself that In 6 months, I have lost 60 pounds and quit smoking. Now that is something to be proud of, what a choice!
I stopped smoking on 01/04/10, yesterday was a true test. I stopped at Walgreen's (best priced cigarettes in town) and stared out them. The clerk asked if he could help me and I said no, I just stood there and stared at them. I wanted to smell or even just hold them but I knew it would be over. I asked myself, what the hell are you doing and got the heck out of dodge.
On my way home I stopped at Sonic and ordered Mozzarella sticks. From one craving to the next, huh? Yea, I caved, I snubbed the cigarettes and decided to go fried. I have to admit, the 5 cheese sticks were the best thing I have eaten in a good while, not literally but it did give me the comfort and ease I was looking for.
I don't feel guilty about my choice, if I did it everyday, it would be a problem but I stopped at the cheese sticks and I got up this morning and had a great workout. Life goes on.
I could sit around all day and try to understand why I allowed myself to turn to food for comfort but instead, I will remind myself that I am on an ever changing journey, new challenges and obstacles everyday. Just like wine, I will improve in quality over time. In the mean time, I will remind myself that In 6 months, I have lost 60 pounds and quit smoking. Now that is something to be proud of, what a choice!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Getting down to business
Monday I went back to work and I am so excited! Today, I received my badge and almost did back flips, I have access to an office, woo-hoo!
Between us, I was a little worried about keeping up with my workouts and eating well after returning to the workforce. So let's set the record strait... this girl is getting down to business!!!
On Monday, my alarm went off and I was out of bed by 5:05am. I even had a little pep in my step being so excited to go back to work. I popped in a Walk away the Pounds and went to walking. It felt great. It really set the tone for my day and I had more energy.
This morning, I hit snooze once, rolled out of bed at 5:12am. I was a little tired but I put on my tennies, popped in Hip Hop Abs and danced for 30 minutes. I felt incredible, I wasn't ready for my workout to end. Monday night, I wasn't able to ride my bike because of Lightning Storms. I decided that I'd hit the pavement for 30 minutes.
Out the door and on my bike I peddaled. I kept a consistent speed of 14 MPH, my highest speed today was 21 MPH for about a minute and a half, talk about a workout. I pulled back into the garage at 6:30am, I got in 6.25 miles. I walked down the street and back to cool down and then streched for a few minutes. There is nothing worse than not allowing your muscles to recover from a workout.
I was running short on time, so I jumped in the shower and got ready in lightining speed. I grabbed my lunch and was out the door on my way to work by 7:15am. Who would have thought.
On my ride to work, I smiled... six glasses of water, 30 minutes of Hip Hop Abs, 30 minutes of Cycling in the great outdoors all by 6:30am... pretty darn proud!
I am feeling so good, I am gonna go out for another ride!
Between us, I was a little worried about keeping up with my workouts and eating well after returning to the workforce. So let's set the record strait... this girl is getting down to business!!!
On Monday, my alarm went off and I was out of bed by 5:05am. I even had a little pep in my step being so excited to go back to work. I popped in a Walk away the Pounds and went to walking. It felt great. It really set the tone for my day and I had more energy.
This morning, I hit snooze once, rolled out of bed at 5:12am. I was a little tired but I put on my tennies, popped in Hip Hop Abs and danced for 30 minutes. I felt incredible, I wasn't ready for my workout to end. Monday night, I wasn't able to ride my bike because of Lightning Storms. I decided that I'd hit the pavement for 30 minutes.
Out the door and on my bike I peddaled. I kept a consistent speed of 14 MPH, my highest speed today was 21 MPH for about a minute and a half, talk about a workout. I pulled back into the garage at 6:30am, I got in 6.25 miles. I walked down the street and back to cool down and then streched for a few minutes. There is nothing worse than not allowing your muscles to recover from a workout.
I was running short on time, so I jumped in the shower and got ready in lightining speed. I grabbed my lunch and was out the door on my way to work by 7:15am. Who would have thought.
On my ride to work, I smiled... six glasses of water, 30 minutes of Hip Hop Abs, 30 minutes of Cycling in the great outdoors all by 6:30am... pretty darn proud!
I am feeling so good, I am gonna go out for another ride!
Sunday, June 27, 2010
All packed and ready to go
Okay, tomorrow morning is my first day to head back to work in over 8 months! Wowzers! My temporary assignment begins tomorrow morning and I am so excited. To have somewhere to go, people to see and even better, earning some money! Woo-Hoo!
My coffee pot is ready, I am going to wake up to the smell of a freshly brewed pot of coffee. My lunch is packed (2 cups salad, 1 grilled chicken breast, 2 tbsl FF Thousand Island dressing, Snacks: 2 slices of cantalope, FiberPlus Bar and a Kashi Bar). I know what I am wearing and my alarm clock is set.
I have to be at the office at 8am. My alarm is set for 5:25 right now. Hmmm, time to change it to 5AM, I'd like to get in a workout video first thing in the morning. Off to bed I go. Wish me luck!!!
My coffee pot is ready, I am going to wake up to the smell of a freshly brewed pot of coffee. My lunch is packed (2 cups salad, 1 grilled chicken breast, 2 tbsl FF Thousand Island dressing, Snacks: 2 slices of cantalope, FiberPlus Bar and a Kashi Bar). I know what I am wearing and my alarm clock is set.
I have to be at the office at 8am. My alarm is set for 5:25 right now. Hmmm, time to change it to 5AM, I'd like to get in a workout video first thing in the morning. Off to bed I go. Wish me luck!!!
When are you ready???
It's a question anyone that has ever struggled or tried more than once to lose weight has asked themselves, when will I be ready to finally make a change? What is enough? What is my breaking point? I must admit I have asked myself these exact questions a bazillion times. Longing and fantasizing to to FINALLY lose weight. We all have different reasons, some reasons more vein than others. Some of us have health scares, others finally see themselves in the mirror or in a photo, cloths don't fit, can't find anything to wear, uncomfortable sitting in a lawn chair, unable to ride a roller coaster anymore, painful shoes, unable to climb a flight of stairs, out of breath, back pain, unhappy, isolated, angry, unattractive, the little black dress, a pair of high heels, going to a high school reunion, looking for a new job, taking a trip... the list goes on and on.
There are many reasons to want to lose weight. So how do you take that want, that desire and turn it into something tangible? Most of us could honestly say, we have "wondered" what "they" did when they lost weight. What was that light bulb moment, when did it register and you finally take the plunge and do it? Why was it different this time?
I've asked myself those questions many times, I would buy every weight loss magazine and read books looking for the answer. I never got it. Sure, I found a little motivation that might last me a week or a few days if I were lucky. Nothing ever just jumped off the page and made me say, today is the day, I am changing my life. Okay, okay, being honest here, sure there were days I said that and you know what, later that day or maybe a few days later, there I was in the McDonalds fast food line which usually lead to going to Taco Bell and maybe even Wendy's. Before you knew it, I was on a downward spiral and going to bed eating a bag (yes, not a bar) of chocolate. I'd wake up bloated and miserable and the cycle would start again. I punished myself with food all of the time. I was utterly hopeless. It came to the point that I wouldn't even admit I was trying to lose weight because I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I would fail.
I began this journey on January 1, 2010. I didn't have a plan other than blogging. Today is June 27, 2010 (178 days later) and I am 60 pounds lighter. Not only am I 60 pounds lighter but I am active. I love the great outdoors: biking, hiking, swimming, and walking. I even enjoy the gym. I can not believe it.
178 days ago, I was miserable and did not have any faith in myself when it came to making a change. So how did the light bulb finally go off? What finally happened to make myself change, how did I become accountable for my actions?
I must admit, the blog helps with my accountability but what finally happened, is that I learned to forgive myself. I realized I was worth the effort and that one mistake that might lead to a week of bad decisions is not worth throwing in the towel. SPARK has truly helped to keep me inspired and of course, all of my blog readers. Thank you for taking this journey with me.
For anyone out there wanting to lose weight and does not know where to start, start small. 10 minutes of exercise, cut back on the Ranch, eat whole wheat bread instead of white, it is lots of little baby steps that add up to something huge.
I am no where near over but the real difference now is that I WILL NOT GIVE UP. Yesterday I spent the day at the water park. I meet some great people, we talked about weight loss, everyone has there own plan and what works for them so do what works best for you. When you fall down, which you will, we all do, just pick yourself up and dust yourself off, it is not over, you must see the big goal no matter how far that goal is, little steps will get you there.
No one can change over night, love yourself, forgive yourself and make yourself a priority everyday, you deserve to be healthy physically and mentally. One meal at a time, one day at a time...You are ready!!!
There are many reasons to want to lose weight. So how do you take that want, that desire and turn it into something tangible? Most of us could honestly say, we have "wondered" what "they" did when they lost weight. What was that light bulb moment, when did it register and you finally take the plunge and do it? Why was it different this time?
I've asked myself those questions many times, I would buy every weight loss magazine and read books looking for the answer. I never got it. Sure, I found a little motivation that might last me a week or a few days if I were lucky. Nothing ever just jumped off the page and made me say, today is the day, I am changing my life. Okay, okay, being honest here, sure there were days I said that and you know what, later that day or maybe a few days later, there I was in the McDonalds fast food line which usually lead to going to Taco Bell and maybe even Wendy's. Before you knew it, I was on a downward spiral and going to bed eating a bag (yes, not a bar) of chocolate. I'd wake up bloated and miserable and the cycle would start again. I punished myself with food all of the time. I was utterly hopeless. It came to the point that I wouldn't even admit I was trying to lose weight because I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I would fail.
I began this journey on January 1, 2010. I didn't have a plan other than blogging. Today is June 27, 2010 (178 days later) and I am 60 pounds lighter. Not only am I 60 pounds lighter but I am active. I love the great outdoors: biking, hiking, swimming, and walking. I even enjoy the gym. I can not believe it.
178 days ago, I was miserable and did not have any faith in myself when it came to making a change. So how did the light bulb finally go off? What finally happened to make myself change, how did I become accountable for my actions?
I must admit, the blog helps with my accountability but what finally happened, is that I learned to forgive myself. I realized I was worth the effort and that one mistake that might lead to a week of bad decisions is not worth throwing in the towel. SPARK has truly helped to keep me inspired and of course, all of my blog readers. Thank you for taking this journey with me.
For anyone out there wanting to lose weight and does not know where to start, start small. 10 minutes of exercise, cut back on the Ranch, eat whole wheat bread instead of white, it is lots of little baby steps that add up to something huge.
I am no where near over but the real difference now is that I WILL NOT GIVE UP. Yesterday I spent the day at the water park. I meet some great people, we talked about weight loss, everyone has there own plan and what works for them so do what works best for you. When you fall down, which you will, we all do, just pick yourself up and dust yourself off, it is not over, you must see the big goal no matter how far that goal is, little steps will get you there.
No one can change over night, love yourself, forgive yourself and make yourself a priority everyday, you deserve to be healthy physically and mentally. One meal at a time, one day at a time...You are ready!!!
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Something I have not done in years...
I wore a dress and even better, I felt great wearing it! This may not seem like much of a post but I honestly can not remember the last time I wore a dress and could actually smile. There was a time that I'd pick this picture apart and find something wrong with it... or actually something wrong with me. Not anymore, those days are over. I no longer sit around beating myself up, I wish my arms were smaller, ugh, look at my legs and the dimples... nope not anymore. I am working to hard and I am loving the new me. Every square inch. My body is changing, taking new shape everyday. I am excited that I am finally molding and shaping the clay I was given, I can't wait to see what my final art piece will look like. In the mean time, I will appreciate the work in progress and sing the theme song my new dress inspired: "I'm bringing sexy back!"
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Outdoor adventure and then some...
The third Sunday of every month there is a canoe feast at a Nature Center that I frequent. Last month was my first time to join in the festivities and I LOVED it! Naturally, after telling my girlfriends all about it, they wanted to try it out. We decided to to make it an all girls outing without the kids, which doesn't happen often. Counting down the days we realized that the third Sunday of June was actually Father's Day. Needless to say, we decided to reschedule the girls weekend for next month. A few of my friends were still able to go so we decided that we would canoe and hike a trail or two.
It was a blazing 101 Degree's so we brought tons of water, wore plenty of sunscreen and brought a few snacks. As we were putting on our vest, we quickly see a sign that makes us really questions the laws in Texas. Did you know that it is against the law to molest an Alligator, um yea... I guess I will mark that off my bucket list since it's illegal (are you kidding me, we need a law for this?!?!?! REALLY?!?!?!) So, just for your amusement:
After a good laugh, our adventure began...
After Canoeing, we hit the trails, breathtaking views. I love the way the light hits this tree and the forest.
After taking in some beautiful scenery we quickly meet the stairs to hell! Talk about a killer cardio work out!
.
Four and half hours later, we were all beat. On my ride home, I noticed my tooth began to bother me. When I got home, I took some Advil and hopped in the shower. I headed over to my parents house to spend some time with my Dad. During our visit, my tooth started to throb. By midnight, my jaw had began to swell. This morning, it was huge and I was in major pain. It's hard to imagine that just only a few hours before I was out with my friends having a good time enjoying the great outdoors. Fortunatly, I was able to have emergency oral surgery... not exactly fun but my mouth will be healthier once I heal.
I do have a few sutures so I am resting per the Dr's orders. I might try to take a little stroll around the block tomorrow.
You know how snap happy I am, so here is my golf ball jaw. Pre-Surgery Pics:
Update: Lots of tenderness that should go away over the next few days. I am still very swollen, dozing in and out of sleep but feeling much much better. The great news is that I wont have to worry about that side of my mouth anymore. I do have additional dental work that needs to be done but honestly, I am 50% there. I am getting closer to a perfectly healthy mouth! Yippee!
It was a blazing 101 Degree's so we brought tons of water, wore plenty of sunscreen and brought a few snacks. As we were putting on our vest, we quickly see a sign that makes us really questions the laws in Texas. Did you know that it is against the law to molest an Alligator, um yea... I guess I will mark that off my bucket list since it's illegal (are you kidding me, we need a law for this?!?!?! REALLY?!?!?!) So, just for your amusement:
After a good laugh, our adventure began...
After Canoeing, we hit the trails, breathtaking views. I love the way the light hits this tree and the forest.
After taking in some beautiful scenery we quickly meet the stairs to hell! Talk about a killer cardio work out!
. Four and half hours later, we were all beat. On my ride home, I noticed my tooth began to bother me. When I got home, I took some Advil and hopped in the shower. I headed over to my parents house to spend some time with my Dad. During our visit, my tooth started to throb. By midnight, my jaw had began to swell. This morning, it was huge and I was in major pain. It's hard to imagine that just only a few hours before I was out with my friends having a good time enjoying the great outdoors. Fortunatly, I was able to have emergency oral surgery... not exactly fun but my mouth will be healthier once I heal.
I do have a few sutures so I am resting per the Dr's orders. I might try to take a little stroll around the block tomorrow.
You know how snap happy I am, so here is my golf ball jaw. Pre-Surgery Pics:
Update: Lots of tenderness that should go away over the next few days. I am still very swollen, dozing in and out of sleep but feeling much much better. The great news is that I wont have to worry about that side of my mouth anymore. I do have additional dental work that needs to be done but honestly, I am 50% there. I am getting closer to a perfectly healthy mouth! Yippee!
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Is it possible...
That this girl is a cyclist? You better bet your butt I am! That's right, this girl loves her bike!
It's hard to imagine that I absolutely LOVE riding my bike and hitting the trails. Before buying my bike in late February, I hadn't rode a bike since I was... ummmm, let's see..... like EIGHT! Yea, eight years old. Well, I am not gonna just throw my age out there but come on people, that has been a while (LOL)!
In January, I made the decision that I wanted to try riding a bike. It seemed easy enough and well come on, everyone knows the saying: It's like riding a bike! So how hard could it be? Everyone remembers how to ride, oh yea, I can do this... I think, at least I can give it a try.
I began looking at stores and found a few that were a little over 100, being unemployed, I wanted to spend less than that. I checked online and found a bike for $96. SOLD to the lady in red, naturally, that was me and I purchased it. It was great because it was delivered to the store for free and they even assembled it for free.
The day I picked it up, I took one look at the seat and knew, I'd need something else. I grabbed the biggest, softest seat that I could find. Once again the store came to the rescue and put it on for me. I was excited and couldn't wait to get home and try it out.
As soon as I got home, I pull out my bike and hop on.... off I go. Oh man, this is rough, pedaling is hard... okay folk's, the saying is true, you do not forget how to ride a bike but let me be the first to say it was not as easy as 1... 2.... 3 and well, it is nothing like being eight years old again. No wheelies, no hands free, no racing... every bit of my concentration was focused on balancing, not losing control; of course pedaling was pretty important too.
Man that ride was tough, I honestly didn't think I could do it. I pushed myself and I was only able to do half a mile. With my son's encouragement, later that day I did another half mile totalling one mile on my first day. Biking was hard, and I was out of shape.
As much as I wanted to say forget that dang bike, I promised myself, I would try. I joined a group on spark which I need to walk/bike 500 miles in 2010 so that encouraged me to get up and get on that bike again and again... eventually, I was able to do one mile, then two and then three miles strait. I was thrilled when I pushed myself to 5 miles. For several weeks I have been consistently riding 5 miles several days a week. Occasionally I would push myself a little further and make it to 6.5 miles. Talk about being proud!!!
Well, today, I did something even more... I was able to ride 15 miles!!! Yes Fifteen miles and my highest speed today 21.7 MPH. Not only did it feel incredible, it made me realize how strong I am and how anything is possible if you try.
Four months ago, I had to fight with every piece of myself to complete half a mile and today, I accomplished 15 miles. So when I ask, is it possible that little ol' me is a cyclist... Oh yea, I am a cyclist!
For anyone out there thinking about riding a bike, don't be afraid, just try it. Not only does it get you up and moving, it get's you out of the house, there are some great trails just for biking and you can see some amazing scenery while you clear your head and build your muscles. If you think your too big, don't doubt yourself, there is a bike out there waiting for you. And don't forget the gel seat... your booty will love you forever!
Wanted to share a few pics, this is the gorgeous lake I rode today!!!
My bike (one day, I will get a nicer bike, but right now, I love this one, especially with my speedometer and odometer)
Yea, after 15 miles, I ROCK!!!
It's hard to imagine that I absolutely LOVE riding my bike and hitting the trails. Before buying my bike in late February, I hadn't rode a bike since I was... ummmm, let's see..... like EIGHT! Yea, eight years old. Well, I am not gonna just throw my age out there but come on people, that has been a while (LOL)!
In January, I made the decision that I wanted to try riding a bike. It seemed easy enough and well come on, everyone knows the saying: It's like riding a bike! So how hard could it be? Everyone remembers how to ride, oh yea, I can do this... I think, at least I can give it a try.
I began looking at stores and found a few that were a little over 100, being unemployed, I wanted to spend less than that. I checked online and found a bike for $96. SOLD to the lady in red, naturally, that was me and I purchased it. It was great because it was delivered to the store for free and they even assembled it for free.
The day I picked it up, I took one look at the seat and knew, I'd need something else. I grabbed the biggest, softest seat that I could find. Once again the store came to the rescue and put it on for me. I was excited and couldn't wait to get home and try it out.
As soon as I got home, I pull out my bike and hop on.... off I go. Oh man, this is rough, pedaling is hard... okay folk's, the saying is true, you do not forget how to ride a bike but let me be the first to say it was not as easy as 1... 2.... 3 and well, it is nothing like being eight years old again. No wheelies, no hands free, no racing... every bit of my concentration was focused on balancing, not losing control; of course pedaling was pretty important too.
Man that ride was tough, I honestly didn't think I could do it. I pushed myself and I was only able to do half a mile. With my son's encouragement, later that day I did another half mile totalling one mile on my first day. Biking was hard, and I was out of shape.
As much as I wanted to say forget that dang bike, I promised myself, I would try. I joined a group on spark which I need to walk/bike 500 miles in 2010 so that encouraged me to get up and get on that bike again and again... eventually, I was able to do one mile, then two and then three miles strait. I was thrilled when I pushed myself to 5 miles. For several weeks I have been consistently riding 5 miles several days a week. Occasionally I would push myself a little further and make it to 6.5 miles. Talk about being proud!!!
Well, today, I did something even more... I was able to ride 15 miles!!! Yes Fifteen miles and my highest speed today 21.7 MPH. Not only did it feel incredible, it made me realize how strong I am and how anything is possible if you try.
Four months ago, I had to fight with every piece of myself to complete half a mile and today, I accomplished 15 miles. So when I ask, is it possible that little ol' me is a cyclist... Oh yea, I am a cyclist!
For anyone out there thinking about riding a bike, don't be afraid, just try it. Not only does it get you up and moving, it get's you out of the house, there are some great trails just for biking and you can see some amazing scenery while you clear your head and build your muscles. If you think your too big, don't doubt yourself, there is a bike out there waiting for you. And don't forget the gel seat... your booty will love you forever!
Wanted to share a few pics, this is the gorgeous lake I rode today!!!
My bike (one day, I will get a nicer bike, but right now, I love this one, especially with my speedometer and odometer)
Yea, after 15 miles, I ROCK!!!
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Getting Back on Track
Every month I log my success, I usually do this the beginning of each month. Today is 6/15 and I had not posted my progress yet. Partly because I was avoiding it. I haven't lost much weight, okay there was the one pound but that is not exactly something to scream from the top of a mountain however it is a loss.
As I was reviewing my May goals and what I actually accomplished, I came to realize that my passion for my health is flickering... like a candle that is nearly burnt out, my flame has become weak. So what do I do? Throw in the towel, call it quits? Not hardly! It's time to recharge and revamp... I have come to far to turn back now.
I need to take it back to the basics. I know I said this a few weeks ago but since then I have had a cookie here, bought ground beef there, ate white bread at a party, had a handful of chips and then another... just plain comfortable and sure, I will have fries with that. The honeymoon phase is over, everyday it is slipping further and further away.
The reality is, I am tired of slacking; there is no more time for excuses, I am committed to my health and reaching my ultimate goal of overcoming obesity.
To putting on my shoes and getting back to the basics and back on TRACK!
T ime for my health and exercise everyday
R est at least 8 hours a night
A ccept my shortcomings and forgive myself
C elebrate my success
K eep record of daily calories and water intake
As I was reviewing my May goals and what I actually accomplished, I came to realize that my passion for my health is flickering... like a candle that is nearly burnt out, my flame has become weak. So what do I do? Throw in the towel, call it quits? Not hardly! It's time to recharge and revamp... I have come to far to turn back now.
I need to take it back to the basics. I know I said this a few weeks ago but since then I have had a cookie here, bought ground beef there, ate white bread at a party, had a handful of chips and then another... just plain comfortable and sure, I will have fries with that. The honeymoon phase is over, everyday it is slipping further and further away.
The reality is, I am tired of slacking; there is no more time for excuses, I am committed to my health and reaching my ultimate goal of overcoming obesity.
To putting on my shoes and getting back to the basics and back on TRACK!
T ime for my health and exercise everyday
R est at least 8 hours a night
A ccept my shortcomings and forgive myself
C elebrate my success
K eep record of daily calories and water intake
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Midnight Memories
Friday night around 11:15pm, my son and I had a sweet tooth! You know, one of those, "Ice Cream" would be really good about right now!
I explained to my very fit 14 year old that 11:15 at night is not the best time to indulge in hot fudge and ice cream. He then says, "if we ride our bikes and only get one scoop instead of two... it won't be so bad!" I realized that kid was onto something!
We jump on our bikes, ride to the ice cream store (which closes at 11:30pm) and made it just in time to order. Since they were closing, we sat outside in the parking lot and enjoyed our treats. We shared a few laughs and told a few stories and headed home. The weather was absolutely perfect, the moonlight was gorgeous and we had a nice little breeze.
On my ride home I felt peace and so much happiness. As we got home and I looked at my son opening up the garage door to put up our bikes, I realized... that is what memories are made of! Gotta love the summer!
I explained to my very fit 14 year old that 11:15 at night is not the best time to indulge in hot fudge and ice cream. He then says, "if we ride our bikes and only get one scoop instead of two... it won't be so bad!" I realized that kid was onto something!
We jump on our bikes, ride to the ice cream store (which closes at 11:30pm) and made it just in time to order. Since they were closing, we sat outside in the parking lot and enjoyed our treats. We shared a few laughs and told a few stories and headed home. The weather was absolutely perfect, the moonlight was gorgeous and we had a nice little breeze.
On my ride home I felt peace and so much happiness. As we got home and I looked at my son opening up the garage door to put up our bikes, I realized... that is what memories are made of! Gotta love the summer!
Saturday, June 12, 2010
If you build it, they will come!
Something that I have noticed is that ever since my son and I extended our porch, all of the neighborhood kids hang with us in the evenings.
They have always come over but in the past it was about playing RockBank (I am a rockband junkie, though not of late) and my warm peanut butter cookies but here recently we just don't ever make it inside. We hang out and "play" outside. Yes, play... even me.
I have had so much fun with the kids. I forgot how great dodgeball is and let me tell you, what a work out! Those kids had me busting a sweat and boy was my heart pounding, what a cardio workout! Then, there was the bike race. So, I did't win but third place isn't two shabby when your competetors are 14, 14, 11, 10 and 7. Yea, I placed third (beaten by the 11 and 10 year old). I proudly wear my silver medal and have the right to smack talk my 14 year old, LOL! Of course, he says he let me win but I beg to differ.
I was really worried when I cancelled my gym membership but I can see it is still possible to lose weight with the great outdoors and I have to say, it's so much fun to act like a kid again! The laughter, the joy and not worrying what anyone else thinks! I think, I just might be on to something!
They have always come over but in the past it was about playing RockBank (I am a rockband junkie, though not of late) and my warm peanut butter cookies but here recently we just don't ever make it inside. We hang out and "play" outside. Yes, play... even me.
I have had so much fun with the kids. I forgot how great dodgeball is and let me tell you, what a work out! Those kids had me busting a sweat and boy was my heart pounding, what a cardio workout! Then, there was the bike race. So, I did't win but third place isn't two shabby when your competetors are 14, 14, 11, 10 and 7. Yea, I placed third (beaten by the 11 and 10 year old). I proudly wear my silver medal and have the right to smack talk my 14 year old, LOL! Of course, he says he let me win but I beg to differ.
I was really worried when I cancelled my gym membership but I can see it is still possible to lose weight with the great outdoors and I have to say, it's so much fun to act like a kid again! The laughter, the joy and not worrying what anyone else thinks! I think, I just might be on to something!
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
Some positive news that could become permanent
First things first, I have been MIA the last few days because I have been so sick! Terrible stomach virus, I literally have been in bed for three days. I am feeling better but still not 100%.
On a more positive note... I was extended a job offer today! Woo-Hoo! It is actually a temporary assignement that begins 6/28 and ends 9/17, it does have the possibility of going permanent so who know's... I just might knock their socks off and have a full fledge job before the summer is over! I am very excited and can't wait to begin. I will keep everyone posted on how things go! Thanks to everyone for their prayers and support! Keep sending them my way! Hugs!
On a more positive note... I was extended a job offer today! Woo-Hoo! It is actually a temporary assignement that begins 6/28 and ends 9/17, it does have the possibility of going permanent so who know's... I just might knock their socks off and have a full fledge job before the summer is over! I am very excited and can't wait to begin. I will keep everyone posted on how things go! Thanks to everyone for their prayers and support! Keep sending them my way! Hugs!
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Light in the storm
When I set out of my journey, I didn't know what path I would take. I wasn't sure of what eating plan I would follow, if I would exercise or what at all would change other than I would write about my attempt to overcome obesity, the challenges, obstacles and my success.
With being true to my intent, I have to say, the last few days have been rough for me. Many of you know, I have been out of work for about seven months now. Needless, to say, it is taking its toll on me. Obviously there is the financial factor but mentally, it has been difficult as well.
I knew if I didn't find a job soon the day would come but I postponed it as long as I could. Instead of weighing in and measuring at the gym on June the second, I had to make a decision to cancel my gym membership. I was terrified to do it but you what they say, when the going gets tough, the tough get going. There was just no other choice, I could no longer spend $35 a month to workout at the gym. I was almost in tears when I cancelled, but being the big girl I am, I held it back.
On my way home I went through a slew of emotions.
Frustration: I paid for that membership for years and never used it. FINALLY, I've been working out 5 months and now I can't afford it?!?! What is wrong with me, why didn't I take control of my health sooner?
DOUBT: You can't do this without Curves, you need resistance training and well... your not gonna do it on your own. You might as well get a pizza on the way home, your gonna gain the 53 pounds back and always be the big girl!
ANGER: Why is this happening to me?!?
My mind took over and thoughts flew back and forth. The biggest thing in my head was fear. Am I going to gain back the 53 pounds that I have lost? I will, I know I will... I can't do this without the gym. I am never going to lose the weight.
Thank goodness my sanity took control again, I could lose weight, I am losing weight! I have workout DVDs that I do on a regular basis, I walk, I hike, I bike! I quieted the voice within, somewhat at peace with my decision and my ability to tackle this without my gym membership.
When I got home, I decided it was time to SPARK, I grabbed a glass of water and started to log in to my laptop... and then it happened. I spilled a glass of water and the flood gates opened!
I cried for about two hours. Is that even possible? I assume that I only had that many tears because of all the water I drank over the weekend. I honestly must have drank about 6 gallons during my project warrior weekend! Clearly, I was bummed out and at my limit.
Of course, the flood was more about being scared of failing than making a huge mess. I just couldn't stop the doubt and insecurities. They hit me like a deer in headlights, I cried like a baby and then crawled in bed and went to sleep.
When I woke up, I decided that I needed to SPARK, I needed motivation and inspiration. I sit back down with a new glass of water and there it was: I was named DONE Girl of the month!
It could not have come at a better time. There are so many people that believe in me, that have faith in me. That actually see how strong I am even though I have doubts about myself. This honor, this feeling, it is amazing. I was just thrilled and in awe that I was chosen. It lifted my spirits and let me know, I am not in this alone, I don't need the gym... I CAN do this. Sure I am going to have to get out of my comfort zone and find new ways to get in that burn but it can be done!!! I am going to do this and I will not give up.
So I want to take a moment and thank the DONE GIRL Team, my blog followers and all the incredible SPARKERS who have given me inspiration, strength and motivation. You help me to believe in myself and know that it is not over, we all have set backs and all that matters is how we choose to look at them. My journey is not over, I am no where near that finish line but I am one step closer because of you. I really can not thank each of you enough for your support, encouragement and helping me believe in me when I felt like I couldn't do this anymore. You are my light in the storm!
For those of you who are not familiar with SPARK, check them out at sparkpeople.com. This is basically the Facebook of weightloss. You can track calories, exercise, find an eating plan, set up an exercise program... the benefits are endless but most importantly, there is so much hope, inspiration and motivation. If you struggle at all or are looking for support, I strongly urge you check out there website. You can also find my sparkpage at: http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage.asp?id=330POUNDWOMAN
It can be a little overwhelming at first but before you know it, you will be able to use the website with your eyes closed. If you decide to join, add me as a friend and I will help you out anyway that I can.
With being true to my intent, I have to say, the last few days have been rough for me. Many of you know, I have been out of work for about seven months now. Needless, to say, it is taking its toll on me. Obviously there is the financial factor but mentally, it has been difficult as well.
I knew if I didn't find a job soon the day would come but I postponed it as long as I could. Instead of weighing in and measuring at the gym on June the second, I had to make a decision to cancel my gym membership. I was terrified to do it but you what they say, when the going gets tough, the tough get going. There was just no other choice, I could no longer spend $35 a month to workout at the gym. I was almost in tears when I cancelled, but being the big girl I am, I held it back.
On my way home I went through a slew of emotions.
Frustration: I paid for that membership for years and never used it. FINALLY, I've been working out 5 months and now I can't afford it?!?! What is wrong with me, why didn't I take control of my health sooner?
DOUBT: You can't do this without Curves, you need resistance training and well... your not gonna do it on your own. You might as well get a pizza on the way home, your gonna gain the 53 pounds back and always be the big girl!
ANGER: Why is this happening to me?!?
My mind took over and thoughts flew back and forth. The biggest thing in my head was fear. Am I going to gain back the 53 pounds that I have lost? I will, I know I will... I can't do this without the gym. I am never going to lose the weight.
Thank goodness my sanity took control again, I could lose weight, I am losing weight! I have workout DVDs that I do on a regular basis, I walk, I hike, I bike! I quieted the voice within, somewhat at peace with my decision and my ability to tackle this without my gym membership.
When I got home, I decided it was time to SPARK, I grabbed a glass of water and started to log in to my laptop... and then it happened. I spilled a glass of water and the flood gates opened!
I cried for about two hours. Is that even possible? I assume that I only had that many tears because of all the water I drank over the weekend. I honestly must have drank about 6 gallons during my project warrior weekend! Clearly, I was bummed out and at my limit.
Of course, the flood was more about being scared of failing than making a huge mess. I just couldn't stop the doubt and insecurities. They hit me like a deer in headlights, I cried like a baby and then crawled in bed and went to sleep.
When I woke up, I decided that I needed to SPARK, I needed motivation and inspiration. I sit back down with a new glass of water and there it was: I was named DONE Girl of the month!
It could not have come at a better time. There are so many people that believe in me, that have faith in me. That actually see how strong I am even though I have doubts about myself. This honor, this feeling, it is amazing. I was just thrilled and in awe that I was chosen. It lifted my spirits and let me know, I am not in this alone, I don't need the gym... I CAN do this. Sure I am going to have to get out of my comfort zone and find new ways to get in that burn but it can be done!!! I am going to do this and I will not give up.
So I want to take a moment and thank the DONE GIRL Team, my blog followers and all the incredible SPARKERS who have given me inspiration, strength and motivation. You help me to believe in myself and know that it is not over, we all have set backs and all that matters is how we choose to look at them. My journey is not over, I am no where near that finish line but I am one step closer because of you. I really can not thank each of you enough for your support, encouragement and helping me believe in me when I felt like I couldn't do this anymore. You are my light in the storm!
For those of you who are not familiar with SPARK, check them out at sparkpeople.com. This is basically the Facebook of weightloss. You can track calories, exercise, find an eating plan, set up an exercise program... the benefits are endless but most importantly, there is so much hope, inspiration and motivation. If you struggle at all or are looking for support, I strongly urge you check out there website. You can also find my sparkpage at: http://www.sparkpeople.com/mypage.asp?id=330POUNDWOMAN
It can be a little overwhelming at first but before you know it, you will be able to use the website with your eyes closed. If you decide to join, add me as a friend and I will help you out anyway that I can.
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Weekend Project Warrior
Friday morning when I woke up, I was sore from all the shoveling on Thursday but I wasn't going to let that stop me. I had another idea this morning and knew that I would be building a raised flowerbed. I was at Home Depot by 8:00 am. I received great service and was even served coffee, wow, I might need to come to Home Depot every morning! I explained to Mark what I wanted to do, drew a little diagram and told him I had no clue of what I was doing. Before you know it, I am leaving home depot with decorative stones, rebar, top soil, garden soil, a drilling hammer; and flowers. I can't wait to make it home and begin my project.
Before
During
Finished
WOW, I did that, can you believe it?!? Thanks to my Dad and my brother for letting me borrow a coal chisle to score and cut my bricks for the perfect fit. Friday was a success! Just another day of hard work and a girl determined to tackle a project. What a workout, 12 hours in the yard, digging, moving bricks, hammering in rebar, moving bricks, filing holes with sand and excess dirt, moving bricks, planting flowers and did I mention, moving bricks? It took me few times to figure it out exactly but I think it turned out great.
On Saturday morning, I didn't think I would be able to move, but I did. My son and I head back out to Home Depot and to Lowes for additional supplies, pavers, sand and a retaining edge. It was great having a helper.
We get home, unload our new materials and dig in, literally! We dig out a complete 4x6 area that was about 5 inches deep
install the retaining wall, level and pack the ground
We add sand and level that
We finally begin to add the paving stones
Now it's time to cut strait lines and right angles... oh no, I don't think I can do this. Thank goodness my father is great with Math and measurements, he came over and helped me figure out my right angle. When he left, I began to score the brick and oh no, the brick crumbled, I try another and another... oh no, they all crumble. At this rate, I am ready to scream. I call my Dad again, and he suggest I call it a night and ask Lowes how to cut the brick tomorrow. I take his advice.
On Sunday, I decided to forget it, I would return the brick and buy a brick that has a strait edge. I looked online at bricks at Lowes and Home Depot. I do a little math and calculate how many new bricks I will need. My son and I load all the paving stones back up and head back to Lowes. Of course, no one could tell me how to cut the brick. In frustration, I decide I will not buy the bricks from Lowes and head back to Home Depot. Before you know it, I am headed home with my new supplies, my son and I both looked at each other and said, we are almost done!
The new brick I purchased was 4 inches thick, we had to dig out a lot of sand from our work area. After doing so, we wet the sand and leveled it back out, we begin to install the bricks, creating a pattern, there are a few adjustments we need to make. My Son scores and cuts a few bricks
I score and cut a few bricks
Row by row we are so close to being done and then it happens: ONE BRICK SHORT! NOOOOOOO!!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
My Son urges me to wait until Monday but of course, I can not rest until this patio is done! Back to Home Depot, one last brick!!!
I make it home pretty quickly, we pop in the brick, pour sand on top of the patio, fill the cracks and sweep it off... we are done!
4 Days, 34 laborous hours, 9 trips to Home Depot and Lowes, umpteen houndred pounds of brick, 6 hours of shoveling, 4 hours of leveling, 20 gallons of water and one small project idea later.... we were able to kick back and enjoy our new porch.
Before
During
Finished
WOW, I did that, can you believe it?!? Thanks to my Dad and my brother for letting me borrow a coal chisle to score and cut my bricks for the perfect fit. Friday was a success! Just another day of hard work and a girl determined to tackle a project. What a workout, 12 hours in the yard, digging, moving bricks, hammering in rebar, moving bricks, filing holes with sand and excess dirt, moving bricks, planting flowers and did I mention, moving bricks? It took me few times to figure it out exactly but I think it turned out great.
On Saturday morning, I didn't think I would be able to move, but I did. My son and I head back out to Home Depot and to Lowes for additional supplies, pavers, sand and a retaining edge. It was great having a helper.
We get home, unload our new materials and dig in, literally! We dig out a complete 4x6 area that was about 5 inches deep
install the retaining wall, level and pack the ground
We add sand and level that
We finally begin to add the paving stones
Now it's time to cut strait lines and right angles... oh no, I don't think I can do this. Thank goodness my father is great with Math and measurements, he came over and helped me figure out my right angle. When he left, I began to score the brick and oh no, the brick crumbled, I try another and another... oh no, they all crumble. At this rate, I am ready to scream. I call my Dad again, and he suggest I call it a night and ask Lowes how to cut the brick tomorrow. I take his advice.
On Sunday, I decided to forget it, I would return the brick and buy a brick that has a strait edge. I looked online at bricks at Lowes and Home Depot. I do a little math and calculate how many new bricks I will need. My son and I load all the paving stones back up and head back to Lowes. Of course, no one could tell me how to cut the brick. In frustration, I decide I will not buy the bricks from Lowes and head back to Home Depot. Before you know it, I am headed home with my new supplies, my son and I both looked at each other and said, we are almost done!
The new brick I purchased was 4 inches thick, we had to dig out a lot of sand from our work area. After doing so, we wet the sand and leveled it back out, we begin to install the bricks, creating a pattern, there are a few adjustments we need to make. My Son scores and cuts a few bricks
I score and cut a few bricks
Row by row we are so close to being done and then it happens: ONE BRICK SHORT! NOOOOOOO!!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
My Son urges me to wait until Monday but of course, I can not rest until this patio is done! Back to Home Depot, one last brick!!!
I make it home pretty quickly, we pop in the brick, pour sand on top of the patio, fill the cracks and sweep it off... we are done!
4 Days, 34 laborous hours, 9 trips to Home Depot and Lowes, umpteen houndred pounds of brick, 6 hours of shoveling, 4 hours of leveling, 20 gallons of water and one small project idea later.... we were able to kick back and enjoy our new porch.
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