Yesterday was a stressful day. Not sure if was the fact that Tuesday was my Monday or I was running behind on chores... it was just a tough day. When I left the office yesterday, I wanted a cigarette. Seriously WANTED a cigarette. You know, gut wrenching, need it right now and can't stop till I get it!
I stopped smoking on 01/04/10, yesterday was a true test. I stopped at Walgreen's (best priced cigarettes in town) and stared out them. The clerk asked if he could help me and I said no, I just stood there and stared at them. I wanted to smell or even just hold them but I knew it would be over. I asked myself, what the hell are you doing and got the heck out of dodge.
On my way home I stopped at Sonic and ordered Mozzarella sticks. From one craving to the next, huh? Yea, I caved, I snubbed the cigarettes and decided to go fried. I have to admit, the 5 cheese sticks were the best thing I have eaten in a good while, not literally but it did give me the comfort and ease I was looking for.
I don't feel guilty about my choice, if I did it everyday, it would be a problem but I stopped at the cheese sticks and I got up this morning and had a great workout. Life goes on.
I could sit around all day and try to understand why I allowed myself to turn to food for comfort but instead, I will remind myself that I am on an ever changing journey, new challenges and obstacles everyday. Just like wine, I will improve in quality over time. In the mean time, I will remind myself that In 6 months, I have lost 60 pounds and quit smoking. Now that is something to be proud of, what a choice!
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wow....way to go!!! I'd say cheese sticks were WAY worth it! Hang in there girl...and it sounds like you are!!!
ReplyDeleteGood for you! I constantly have those "stare-down" moments at 7-11 in front of the doughnut case and the clerks look at me like I am a nut. The cheese sticks won over the cancer sticks and in my book, that is a win. You know you aren't going to do that constantly... you can't avoid greasy food forever, but you CAN avoid cigarettes forever! Glad you're being realistic!
ReplyDeleteI also have a weakness for Sonic mozz sticks. I had them in June for the first time this year (on a day of driving to Ikea, conveniently on the way, no excuse for grabbing a grilled cheese sandwich there as well though, which I did...). And I'll probably have them 1-2 more times this year, and I feel like that balance is fine. If I ate them daily or weekly, it might be bad, but occasional treats allow me to keep eating healthy the rest of the time, rather than restricting myself and then blowing it.
ReplyDeleteWow conquering two addictions at once I saw way to go...even if you had the mozz sticks at sonic that was just a one time thing. Kudo's to you...
ReplyDeleteTracy
Not many people can claim to have quit smoking and lost so much weight at the same time. Nothing wrong with a splurge now and then and really I see no reason to have to justify it. I am not a big fan of cheesesticks, but I love blizzards/mcflurry's ... but they are so damn many calories. No one else in my house likes them so I can't even share!
ReplyDeleteYou have accomplished so much! Be proud of yourself and move on. Everyone needs a treat every now and again and you have come far enough to see where you've been and where you are going and not let one slip up set off a cycle of bad eating. Good for you!!
ReplyDeleteWhat great progress since January - on so many fronts! (I am envious!) Well done!
ReplyDeleteI don't think a little indulgence every now and then is too bad. You felt satisfied after the cheese sticks..ate them instead of going for a more dangerous craving and then you moved on. I think that's the key. You ate, enjoyed it and got back on track.
Hey girl! Just found your blog :) 60 lbs in 6 months *and* quitting smoking is just incredible. I definitely think that mozz sticks are better than smokes...and are done quicker! WTG on the workout also.
ReplyDeleteYou are an inspiration to me! How amazing you've lost 60 pounds in 6 months. Damn woman! Keep it up... I can totally relate to you!
ReplyDeleteAs a smoker, I need to tell you that I'm extremely proud of you for choosing the cheese sticks over the cancer sticks!! :)
ReplyDelete^^ You are an inspiration and I love reading your blog! I have an award for you over on my blog.
ReplyDelete